Changeable

Anonymous asked: I'm the person who asked that question about how it can be a sin for me to love a man. The thing is, is that I do love God and his son more than anything else in this world. I truly do, but for someone to tell me that my deep love for someone else is a sin, is somewhat hurtful. It hurts me so much. For you to tell me that I'm just feeling lust for this man is incorrect. I love him just like a straight man would love a woman.

Dear Anon,

I know that you’re upset…but I’m asking you to stop for a moment and prayerfully, calmly re-read what I said, because somehow what I’ve said isn’t sinking in.

If you re-read my message, I never used the word “Lust”, once. I went back and checked, just to make sure, and I never once did; neither did I say that love is a sin. I know a good number of homosexual men who love their partners in a more real way than many heterosexual marriages and relationships in the church.

Am I saying that the love you feel isn’t real? No, I am not saying that. Am I saying that it’s only lust? I don’t believe that. Because we are talking about homosexual love, I referred to it as such. If you read “lust”, where I wrote “desire”, I apologize for not being clearer, but I meant desires of the heart, of the emotions, not physical desires. I believe that sexuality is one the deepest expressions of the human soul, and also one of the most broken aspects of our beings. 

You haven’t said if you’re out or not, but you’re dealing with a lot of pain and hurt from condemnation of others. Let me tell you, I have been there, and I’m still there sometimes, and I’m not here to condemn you. My father told my mom, before they ever had children, that he would immediately disown any son of his who choose to be gay. I didn’t choose to be gay, it’s something which always seemed to be, but before I was born, my father was set against me. My father was set against me before I was born.

So, let me tell you, I have been where you are, and if there’s anything I am here for, it is not to for one moment to condemn you, and I will never condemn you. 

However, I cannot ignore the truth of the Word. No matter how my heart feels, I cannot. Personally, I desire happy endings for everyone, I desire wedding cakes and sunsets and a hell-less eternity. But God speaks a very different truth. He defines a Holy Love, a love different from what you and I are used to.

So, please, re-read what I’ve written, and then tell me what you think. 

Prayerfully yours,

Schuyler

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